As some of you may know, I'm planning a visit to my girl's house this weekend. Naturally the lady peep found out. She's like really wierded out here. All week, she's been testing me on my manners and it's making me crazy. Here's an example.
Last night we was watching TV - me and the man peep on one TV watching chair, the lady peep and her current quilt project on the other one. I decided it was time to take a little bath. So I did what I always do. I began by licking one paw and washing the other one with it. Then, I found a sticky bit between my toes and started chewing on it with my teeth. I pulled out the tuft of fur that was bothering me and spit it out on the man peep's lap. You'd think the world was coming to an end. What was I supposed to do with it? It's not like anyone puts out handtowels and washcloths for me! I'm a CAT. That lady peep just way over-reacted. She says "Eddy, use your manners, please...you can't be spitting out fur balls at Princess Zipporah's house". I know that, lady peep, that's why I'm taking care of that business now. Geez.
Here's another example.
After the bath was over, I played headbutt for scrittches - then chase the lazer dot - and then purrs for patts so I was extremely tired. Naturally I rolled over, stuck my feet straight up in the air and tried to catch a little cat nap. Do you think she'd let me - Nope Nope Nope.... She's all "Eddy, gentlemen cats sleep curled up in a ball and try to maintain a dignified air about themselves at all times, or else, they stay awake to protect their loved ones. They don't flop down in the middle of the living room floor with their fat tummy's in the air, where a bad guy could swoop down from the sky and carry them off". Ok lady, we was in the livingroom - nothing's going to swoop down from the sky and get me...unless it's you.
Don't even get me started on the catnip situation. She's apprently very afraid I'll over indulge and say or do somethng foolish, that will somehow reflect badly on cats everywhere.
About the ham...This is gonna be very difficult. Apparently I'm supposed to wait till someone offers it to me. I'm not allowed to stand at the refridgerator and cry for it. Nor, apparently is it good manners to jump up on the table and start helping myself. And before I take any, I'm supposed to say Yes, thank-you, I'd love a taste of ham....If I take the time to say that, don't you think Zippy's brothers will already have eaten my share. I do. And they's all gonna think there's something really wrong with me.
And most important - No biting - what the heck is that about. If someone puts the bitey on me...I'm putting the bitey on them right back. I won't start anything, but I sure as heck am not letting all those brothers bite on me. Oh and finally , I have to stay away from the toilet. It's not polite to jump up on it and stare into it especially after its been flushed. Who knew!!! Jikes Get me Out of Here Already.
So anyway, here is a picture of me in the teleporting unit, waiting to be head out to Zippy's house.
Would somebody beam me out of here already!
Last night we was watching TV - me and the man peep on one TV watching chair, the lady peep and her current quilt project on the other one. I decided it was time to take a little bath. So I did what I always do. I began by licking one paw and washing the other one with it. Then, I found a sticky bit between my toes and started chewing on it with my teeth. I pulled out the tuft of fur that was bothering me and spit it out on the man peep's lap. You'd think the world was coming to an end. What was I supposed to do with it? It's not like anyone puts out handtowels and washcloths for me! I'm a CAT. That lady peep just way over-reacted. She says "Eddy, use your manners, please...you can't be spitting out fur balls at Princess Zipporah's house". I know that, lady peep, that's why I'm taking care of that business now. Geez.
Here's another example.
After the bath was over, I played headbutt for scrittches - then chase the lazer dot - and then purrs for patts so I was extremely tired. Naturally I rolled over, stuck my feet straight up in the air and tried to catch a little cat nap. Do you think she'd let me - Nope Nope Nope.... She's all "Eddy, gentlemen cats sleep curled up in a ball and try to maintain a dignified air about themselves at all times, or else, they stay awake to protect their loved ones. They don't flop down in the middle of the living room floor with their fat tummy's in the air, where a bad guy could swoop down from the sky and carry them off". Ok lady, we was in the livingroom - nothing's going to swoop down from the sky and get me...unless it's you.
Don't even get me started on the catnip situation. She's apprently very afraid I'll over indulge and say or do somethng foolish, that will somehow reflect badly on cats everywhere.
About the ham...This is gonna be very difficult. Apparently I'm supposed to wait till someone offers it to me. I'm not allowed to stand at the refridgerator and cry for it. Nor, apparently is it good manners to jump up on the table and start helping myself. And before I take any, I'm supposed to say Yes, thank-you, I'd love a taste of ham....If I take the time to say that, don't you think Zippy's brothers will already have eaten my share. I do. And they's all gonna think there's something really wrong with me.
And most important - No biting - what the heck is that about. If someone puts the bitey on me...I'm putting the bitey on them right back. I won't start anything, but I sure as heck am not letting all those brothers bite on me. Oh and finally , I have to stay away from the toilet. It's not polite to jump up on it and stare into it especially after its been flushed. Who knew!!! Jikes Get me Out of Here Already.
So anyway, here is a picture of me in the teleporting unit, waiting to be head out to Zippy's house.
Would somebody beam me out of here already!
6 comments:
Hi sweety, first of all laying on yoor back wif feets in da air and picking "woogies" out from atween yer toez is whut cats do. Beans get so weerd sumtimes. Oh, and Sadie sed to tell yoo to stop calling her a brofur, she's sensitif about dat stuff*snort* oh, my, did I just snort! oops. Bwaaahaaahaaa. Oh, and mom is just putting a pile of ham out fur any kitty to grab. I guess Speedy's been inviting kittys over to just help themselves. S'kay, we do dat sometimes, just help ourselves I mean. Like taking all the ham offa dads sammich*snicker*. Mom's offa work tomoro, and she's going to be sending out packajes, yup dats rite, your pakaj is still sittin on our table waiting to go out. Mom's reel lazy, did I mention dat?
Zippy only has one brother, Speedy, and he's my boyfriend.
Your friend
Misty E
Gosh Eddy, with all those rules are you sure you don't live in a prison. I mean, I bathe wherever and whenever the mood strikes me and I'm not shy about getting myself some ham if there's some to be had! As for the feet in the air thing, did you tell her sometimes a guy needs to air everything out, especially before seeing his girlfriend?
Maxwell Smartkitty
Eddy, I'm sure everything will be just fine. It's very thoughtful of you to try to take care of all your bathing ahead of time, and as for sleeping with your feet in the air... well that just says you are feeling safe and comfortable. A compliment really. Zippy has already handled the comment about the ham. Don't be too tough on your lady peep though. She's just looking out for you. All parents nag... it's one way of showing love.
wow - yur mom sounds like a stress case. better tell the woman ta chill.
Ha, ha. Eddy I'm sure no matter what you do Zippy will sill be crazy about you. Cause you are so adorable.
Post a Comment